Like It. Like It Not.

Lately I’ve been exceedingly conscious of my emotions. Yeah, I know. ME, more alert to my emotions. I assure you it can be a full time job.

Rewind.

I have another daunting birthday approaching this year. Not too quickly but sooner than I’d like.

Without launching into an Oprah tirade about being more and more comfortable in your body (which really does happen), I assert one definitely becomes more aware of one’s self. Your being. Your likes and dislikes. Your emotions.

I haven’t always, but I appreciate the opportunity to have had time to get good and acquainted with myself. Time to make a friend of myself.

Along with this come these opportunities to laugh at yourself and also to embarrass yourself. Yet at the end of the day, I’m left with only me.

Skip to present again.

I’ve been especially aware of my feelings. I have been able to see a situation generating around me and able to call my reaction seconds before it happens as though I were an outsider watching.

I guess THIS is growing up. Becoming alert to your potential self, evaluating its necessity or appropriateness, and then altering your potential self to truly reflect how you would prefer others to receive you.

Following is a very organic recording of some of my emotions in the past week. I guess with good friends and family, you can just out yourself. I’ve written in the ever simple and ever raw outline of likes and dislikes.

· Midday personal contact: If you deal with me at all, you know I work hard and I work long hours. Because of this, I appreciate my personal moments throughout any day, especially midday. I love Mindee’s BB texts, Mary’s updating phone calls, and even listening to Ashley’s screaming children. But Mary really gets me going in the middle of the day. I love midday shout outs.

· Fresh Laundry: I love linens. I have a love affair with sheets and towels. I love fresh laundry. It always feels good to pull fresh sheets and towels out of the dryer. I love washing your white sheets in the hottest temperature your washer will provide, with a cup of bleach, knowing you are killing at least half of the flu off of them. Aww. Clean sheets.

· Emotions: One in particular. Anticipation. Whether it’s good or bad, but particularly when it’s good. Wait. Wait. Wait. Now you can. YES!

· Barnes & Noble: This is my secular church. My sister(s/in-law) go to libraries. I go to B&N. Some days when I feel like I can’t talk to another person, I’ll turn my phone off and go to B&N right after work and not leave until they close. I’m a late blooming book worm and I like it.

· The Sun: I love it.

· The Snow: Go away. I dislike it on April 25th.

· A text for text and a call for call: Even if your response is 24 hours later, I am a true believer in returning what you have received. I dislike when there is a breakdown.

· Know your place: Don’t tell me you love a song more than anyone around you. Especially when I am around you. Especially when you don’t know the words to the song. Especially when you just heard it for the first time a day ago. I heard it last year, when I watched the movie, the night before I downloaded it. I love this song too. Enough to know when it was released. Trite? Yes. Fact? Yes.

· Holidays: Ever since all of my family moved away, I’ve grown to dislike holidays. I hate thinking about where I’m going to go or if I’m going to celebrate them.

· Vehicle Problems: My car is old and always breaking. It VEXES me greatly.